Yesterday was a hard day for me. It is getting close to my birthday and my mom's birthday, and I am again realizing that I will not be with my mom yet again this year for our birthdays, hers is the day after mine. God has been so gracious to me to give me a mom that is my best friend, someone I love and admire, someone I have fun just spending time with, and most of all, someone who desires to know Him more. In the last year, I have seen my mom grow in her spiritual walk, and I want so much to be there with her. God has been doing a lot in her life, and I am so thankful for that.
I got a crazy idea in my head to fly home this weekend so I could see my mom and dad. Dad, I do miss you too! I had already looked up plane tickets and tried to figure out who I could ask to keep Karis one day, since Justin is off on Saturday is not preaching on Sunday and Monday is a holiday. I was only going to need someone to watch Karis on Tuesday during the day. I had worked it all out in my head and asked the Lord to please let this happen, but when I called my husband to run it by him, the answer was a regretful no. It was no because of many things, but mostly because I am 25 weeks pregnant (I know that it is still safe to fly when you are pregnant), and He doesn't want me flying alone. I never thought about the fact that I was putting a lot of pressure on him to watch Karis for three days by himself. I know he would do it, but I was only thinking about myself and not about my family. Karis would have a really hard time if I was gone for that long.
Wow, it is an amazing thing to have a husband who is so loving and cares for me even when my mind is going another direction. Justin was right as my mom and dad both said. God is continues to show me the gift that I have in my godly, discerning husband. I am so blessed and thankful for rational thought in my life right now when maybe I am just being hormonal!
2 comments:
Hang in there babe. I hope that with time it will get easier on you.
Jeanna, my heart aches for you. I remember too well the feeling of homesickness from living in Kansas. And you do get to a point where you will pay any amount of money and do anything to see your family for just a little while. If I was up there, I'd watch Karis for you all four days so you could go visit your family! I hope you have a fun and restful weekend with Justin and Karis--and that it takes the ache a little bit away from you.
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